Seven and a half seasons, two years, but I think this is the end for myself and FM; I believe that for a while the insularity of our situation had been becoming apparent, but now I don't see any more way to reconnect the pieces, no road no street, no t'other side the way, no end to any row...
Even though I'd joined here in the first helf of this league's existance, our admins had alrady set in motion the process of separating our competitive play from our public rooms, our community sacrificed on the altar of 'better quality haxball'. Many of our older members who were doyens of that ancien régime were pushed away (RIP opc, RIP jonny, RIP joe, RIP rising, RIP brizi), and now we are left with a bailiwick of takers and not givers. In this state of affairs, I no longer have a place.
Let me make this clear, this isn't for the purpose of railing against the current new admins; Hannes and MrP are FM through and through, but I believe they had inherited a dissonant culture to what FM originally was; they're more used to the league being competition rather than community.
This probably isn't a total retirement from all forms of haxball, but I don't think I'll ever return to FM. I shaln't be doing any shoutouts per se, if you enjoyed playing with me here, I hope I made you feel appreciated, if you want me to say something personally to you, or want to say something to me, I'll be on ts still now and again, you can PM me here or there, or send me a postcard
Anyway, what I'd rather do is to call out the people who I belive have made this place all the more miserable, and have you assume that if you're not on this list, then you've probably done alright, honestly otherwise there would be too many people to go through.
This spoiler contains strong language and violent sexual imagery from the start, so if you are of the faint of heart don't open it!
- Spoiler: Show
Fuck you Rachel, it was a mistake for FM to ever let you admin this league, your cynical win-at-all costs mantra was a virus brought over from YeS in the tainted pursuit of better play, forgetting that all you ever benefitted was yourself and your circlejerk. Remember season 5 where you let two teams in who did nothing but turn up for their matches and then leave? You caused the beginning of this league's decline, if only you'd been able to stay away from this league you callous bitch.
Fuck you s.signorelli, I know you never had the good fortune of becoming an admin on FM, but see everything I said about Rachel? Turn it up to eleven. Cancerous is a stong word and often is used as a descriptor to undeserving people, but by god you merit every syllable of that adjective; your obnoxious behaviour, your encouragement of hatred, your imbecility all go to show what an awful blot of blood and sweat you were on the history book of this league.
Fuck you Pedy and your arrogant attitude. How about instead of insulting every player you ever played with under the sun and being a general misery-guts, you get of your stoner arse and do something useful with your life?
Fuck you Pr0, and by extension every other early teenage British player who embraced the idea of fucking everyone else over in the league just to get your three points, you somehow managed to detach yourself from the UK community when on the field with your bunch of mercenaries which was never the same from one game to the next, and at the same time off it embody all that was bad about the 'new generation' of British players. The only mercy you were able to bring was that your quality of play was even worse than the quality of your character, so you didn't get to stick around long.
Fuck you OffSync, do you realise why in Dante's Inferno, the lowest circles of hell are reserved for those who betray their fellow man? You and your band of Budapest bastards never did care about our league and community, you thought it was fun to impersonate and degrade our integrity just for a league did you? Eat a dick. No wonder I share the same level of disdain for your toxic little community as you do for ours. And t he worst part of it, before this I thought you were my friend. I hope you drown in your own piss.
Fuck you Hulk and Yobo, I include you together because you're the inseperable tweedledee and tweedledum of haxball, and both fine examples of why a mother should never drink whilst they're pregnant. Not only have you destroyed one of the more likeable teams in the current era of FM, but the way you treat your teammates, the way you ragequit from friendlies, the way you expect the whole world to revolve around each of you just makes me sick. It's a wonder either of you manages to function in the real world, I hope both of you like anal sex because it looks like there'll be a lot of it where you two junkies are going.
Fuck you Suki, like an irritating housefly that you never seem to be able to swat away, you always seem to return every few months or so, you probably aren't even the worst offender on this list but it's not by lack of trying, similarly to Pedy, take a goddamn step back and learn some humility, bitch.
-SPECIAL CASE-
You know luck, I admire you. For the simple fact that I know that you can't possibly conduct yourself in the way you do online when AFK, I have to have some level of respect for the persona you have created, I suppose a bit similar to the way Kiss Kiss does in SPHB, only slightly more subtle. I cannot say that your contributions to haxball have been entirely positive, but they are certainly unique. What you do takes an amount of intelligence and rhetoric, that is to say you have a talent for trolling. Well done sir.
See you in the next life fishes <><