Tears are the only thing I've digested these past few weeks. This isn't like the American leagues, where free agents are typically signed right away. This is hell, I've been waiting to be signed but looked over like the overweight stripper with bigger love handles than breasts. I taught myself to cope with this not long ago, but I can't do it anymore. All I want is to be loved and to belong to a team, and occasionally play. I overcame the intimidating ping and have played in British rooms among others, and I find myself performing at about 70% of the level I do in my native country. So why?
Why don't you sign me? I understand you don't want to confide in a meager American child whose balls haven't dropped and still cannot communicate with girls without throwing up seconds later, but I'm a good haxball player and that is the only thing that should matter. In America, we consider Europe the land of opportunity! But here I am, chewing on my tears still.